big bag of nothing

I sure picked a good time to become a pseudo-sports blogger. Absolutely NOTHING is going on in sports. Just take a look at the ESPN.com headlines...
Of all those stories, two of them actually involve an actual game, and one of the stories (Tigers win) is an afterthought to a story about something that hasn't happened yet. Everything else involves legal actions being taken against players, suspensions, firings, rumors, or Tiger having a cub. Wait...how can Tiger have a cub...he's a man. His Tigress had the baby. Get your facts straight, ESPN.com. When I have a kid...er...when my wife has a kid I don't want its brain filled with your falsifications.
What's the hot question of the day on ESPN.com? "Will Tiger's daughter play on the PGA tour?" My answer would be "Yes, but only because the PGA officials will think she's a man because Tiger named her Sam", but sadly that is not an option.
The most interesting thing in the above screenshot of ESPN.com is not actually any of the news stories. I'm actually more interested in what's about to happen to that kid's face in the Circuit City advertisement. I'm also interested in this Perlozzo guy that got fired...he and I both have two Z's in our last name.